My Love For You by Timothy Gerald Franklin Lawrence

My love for You
is bigger
than a shoe
 The End

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


Look after yourself...without health
you are of no use to anyone.

If I owned this company,
would I hire someone like me?


THREE Angels!

THREE Angels!
Angela, Ash & Janelle

Ab's ( REALLY GOOD) Joke of the WEEK!

A great example of Flawless Male logic —
This is a conversation between a husband and his wife. Please note that she asks five or six questions which he answered quite simply; but, then she is speechless after answering only one question.

Woman: Do you drink beer?
Man: Yes.

Woman: How many beers a day?
Man: Usually about three.

Woman: How much do you pay per beer?
Man: $5.00 which includes a tip (this is where it gets scary!).

Woman: And how long have you been drinking?
Man: About 20 years, I suppose.

Woman: So a beer costs $5 and you have three beers a day which puts your spending each month at $450. In one year, that would be approximately $5400, correct?
Man: Sounds Correct.

Woman: If in 1 year you spend $5400, not accounting for inflation, over the past 20 years puts your spending at about $108,000, correct?
Man: Again, sounds about right.

Woman: Do you know that if you didn’t drink so much beer, that money could have been put in a step-up interest savings account and after accounting for compound interest for the past 20 years, you could have now bought an airplane?
Man: Could be true. Do you drink beer?

Woman: No.
Man: Where is your airplane?

for Kenneth Mayo

Hope AND SWIM !

When I fall into an ocean, I know with certainty


That I am wet and startled will at once be plain to me


But will I sink or will I swim...to the depths or to the shore?


Perhaps a log will come drifting by, or a boat out on a tour?


I could hope as I was sinking, but I’d still drop to the floor


And hoping would I be, for logs and tour boats evermore


So I think I’ll set my sights on land and give my legs a kick


And stroke though I am weary, my decision will I stick


While Hope sustains the helpless whose outlook is often dim


Hope also fuels the Faithful, giving Strength to those who swim


So even if I falter against this fearsome tide of health


The shores of my fulfillment rise beneath me in my stealth


I’m hopeful for the strength and the courage not to give in


I thank the Lord for Faith and my resolve to hope AND swim!


My prayers and God’s Blessings be with you my friend!

Timothy Lawrence

Abraham Stainer Esq.

Abraham Stainer Esq.
a.k.a. "Ab"

Tinker-Timmy & Friends

Tinker-Timmy & Friends
Jan'l. Angeela, Ash and Ab

Monday, May 18, 2009

Campfire Tale - 36


Morning Friend,
I must admit I wussed out and opted out of lifelong tradition of "heading out of town" for the long weekend.
The "May Long", had always been synonymous with "the Outdoors"; and all the freshness and beauty one associates with being cradled in "Mother Nature's Bosom".
And as much as I yearned to luxuriate my Winter-ravaged senses upon it, the bosom was covered in 4 inches of fresh snow...which for the hardy souls who DID go out, must have at least made a fine beer cradle !?
There was a time when you would have had to incarcerate me to keep me in the city on a long weekend.
It just wasn't done.
( I was locked up during a long weekend but that's a story for another day.... "Great Misunderstandings of the 20th Century"? )
For weeks in advance of Great Victoria Day Weekend Hoot, the simmering anticipation could be somewhat contained by fine-tuning your carefully prepared List.
I found an old one of mine in one of my "tickle trunks" of memories....
1. BEER
2. bait
3. RUM
4. wieners
5. WINE
6. marshmallows
7. VODKA
8. beef jerky
9. KALUHA
10. mix
11. SUNDAY BEER
12. ice
From this all-encompassing list of camping essentials, one can plainly see the indelible survivalist instincts I'd garnered through my years in the Cub and Boy Scouts!
I must apologize for the "urbane" inclusion of wieners on the list, but they were STRICTLY for emergency purposes, on the "off chance" that I got too drunk to catch any fish; or be functional enough to try.
In those "heady years", it was enough to throw your rod in the trunk and even if the only light it saw all weekend was when you were digging out beer from underneath it, you could still say you "went fishing".
As far as the WEATHER went....YOU went.
May weather in this part of the world runs the seasonal gamut, so when the calendar said "long weekend" and your friends said "West Hawk", and the forecast said "...chance of flurries...", you said to yourself, " ...long underwear and extra hard stuff....".
In the course of 48-plus hours outdoors, one is imminently bound to experience SOME form of precipitation ranging anywhere from refreshing morning dew...to a tsunami...or a rare but annoying Spring blizzard.
That's what TARPS were made for.
To huddle under in pouring rain and howling wind and drunkenly curse the bad weather which was preventing you from "wetting a line".
The "liquid warmth" carefully planned, listed and packed provides an "internal tarp" that is soon taut and gets tauter with each "tot".
The warmth becomes distilled into something like courage as the lengthening shadows portend the coming of night so blindingly dark that all but the trees fear it.
Here in the "rough part" of Mother Nature's Town... it's "after hours".
It's SURVIVOR...PROVINCIAL CAMPGROUND!!!
There were but few other places where a man's mastery over the elements could be so vividly displayed than when around the blazing fire HE sparked, ( with a little help from a splash of kerosene)....the still night air tinged with mirthful revelry and the strains of Lynrd Skynrd emanating from his 200 watt Pioneer car stereo....the oneness he felt with the universe converged with his double distilled equilibrium, creating a literal "baptism of fire" as he tripped and fell ass-backwards into the very flames of his own making.
Impervious to cold, wet AND fire.... was the TRUE OUTDOORSMAN !
Free from cosmopolitan restraints - like public urinals and personality codes - a properly "outfitted" Woodsman could fully experience, if not remember, the graciousness of God's greenery...the firmament of the Forest...the lusciousness of LIFE!
If the "bosomy cradle" of his bed turned out to be the not quite "pillow-topped" gnarly base of a spruce tree under which he had finally lost consciousness, then he was "roughing it".
If he forgot tomato juice for morning Red-eyes and had to start with straight beer for breakfast than he was REALLY roughing it.
If he ran out of ice and that beer was WARM, then we're talking about a Baden Powell level of camping fortitude !
The advent in recent times of more "family-oriented" campground rules and regulations has really curtailed the long weekend excursions of compromised outdoorsmen in the Parks they and I used to go "camping" in.
And it's probably just as well my friend.
I've had enough of the "rough" stuff.
love tImMy:/
Laugh as much as you breathe...
Love as long as you live ( "dib-dobbing")
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Life Stories

Life Stories by Tim Lawrence

The end of life…is not!

It is the end of a Chapter in a Grand, Spiritual, Novel !

These chapters called “life”, are enriching, engrossing
narratives of one’s earthly adventures.

In them, are an abundance of supporting characters and
supplementary plot elements, often curiously overlapping
and mysteriously intertwining.

Their length and depth varies from person to person;
from protagonist to protagonist.

Some people who have “died” in chapters ended many years
ago, are still quite “alive” today!

Their SPIRIT; their influence, their charisma, their wisdom,
their character, their enthusiasm, their joy, their ESSENCE....
continues to fill the “life pages” of all they’ve touched.

Their frail and finite physical chapter is ended, but the richness
of their story flourishes, and enhances God’s Novel!

Like timeless passages, indelibly marked in our hearts and
memories, to be re-read and forever treasured….
their lives never truly “end”!

When through God’s Mercy, the earthly narrative of someone
we love, ends….their life does not!

And for that, we are truly blessed!

* Dedicated with gratitude and love to the enduring Spirit of all who transcend fear and inspire faith by truly living God’s gift of life to the fullest!! T.L.